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Note: This is now an edited version, with some clarifying points for those who responded to this post with their thoughts and wisdom. Thank you....keep it coming. Those of you who have heard me speak or worked with me as a guide likely have heard me say that modern marriage is catastrophic to the authentic (wild) masculine and feminine.

James Hillman states "there are more wars in recorded history than there are years in recorded history." Modern man is a warring creature. But perhaps it has not always been this way.

For a woman, finding a lover who is generous and often as a result, informed about the anatomy of female pleasure, is the golden, frosting-on-the-cake goal of her search; the piece de resistance. And yet, there can be pitfalls or outright dangers for a man who focuses almost exclusively on his partner's pleasure. It can easily contribute to the alienation of the full emotional repertoire of his masculinity.

For many years now I have been cultivating a practice of using extended orgasm as an enhanced state of consciousness within which it is possible to deeply imagine myself in the reality of another being; a deer, a tree, a snake, a cold mountain stream, a young girl in the forest, accompanied by rich sensory experiences like smell, sound, taste and touch. With this practice has come a heightened intensity of compassion and unconditional love for everything and everyone around me.

As is known to anyone who is familiar with my couple's work, I work in the couple's home in the capacity of sacred witness to the dance of their love making. This is profound work. Typically, it is the woman who brings me into their home. She has heard of me or found me on the web and she has approached her partner with the desire to hire me. Usually, her partner is skeptical. Yet, without fail, it is the man who, just moments into our first session, turns to me and demands, "why isn't this available all the time, for everyone?!"

Making Love is a radical human act. Not only does it have the potential to create new human life and primal bonds between us that cannot be explained scientifically, it has the power to connect us with something far greater than ourselves; reminding us of our interconnectedness with all life. The fullness of our authentic sexual experience also has the power to move us through trauma stored in our bodies, not simply so we are 'healed' but so we are more than who we were before the trauma took place. And, given that we have ALL experienced trauma, this is an important piece of information.